Saturday, 20 January 2018

Even native English speakers get confused

Happy weekend language learners!

This weekend, I'd like to keep the topic light and maybe fun. There are two (and maybe more) popular and well-known joke poems about English grammar and spelling. If you are feeling fustrated by English, then take a break enjoy these poems. Maybe you are confused just because English can be confusing.


English student is confused

I will post just the first parts of two poems and the link at the end so you can read the whole poem if you want to. Also, if you are feeling that English is boring, you can email me at englishispersonal@gmail.com and we'll create a tutoring plan that makes English fun again!

Helpful information: Many of the difficult words in this post (and in past posts) are linked to definitions or pictures. Just click the difficult word link!


Poem #1


..If you're studying English and it confuses you, think about

the confusion it has for people who grew up speaking it: English is a crazy language

If pro and con are opposites, is congress the opposite of progress?

There is no egg in eggplant, no pine or apple in pineapple, and no ham 

in hamburger, English muffins weren't invented in England or French Fries in France. 

Sweet meats are candy, while sweetbreads, which aren't, are meat.

Exploring it's paradoxes, we find that quick sand works slowly, boxing rings are square, 

public bathrooms have no bath, and a guinea pig is neither a pig nor from Guinea.

https://www.ocf.berkeley.edu/~mbarrien/jokes/english.txt


Poem #2


ENGLISH
We'll begin with box, and the plural is boxes;
But the plural of ox should be oxen, not oxes.
Then one fowl is goose, but two are called geese
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a whole lot of mice,
But the plural of house is houses, not hice.
https://www.ocf.berkeley.edu/~mbarrien/jokes/english.txt


I hope you feel a little better about English now. Have a great weekend!






If you are feeling English is only boring, we can fix that!
Matthew
englishispersonal@gmail.com

No comments:

Post a Comment